In this video Coach Dan Clemens discusses ways on how to Help Kids Cope With Frustration.
This is part 6 of the series of our interview with Coach Dan Clemens.
Read on below to discover how Coach Dan helps kids deal with frustration in sports.
If a kid is upset after a game, it depends on the kid. At some point, all kids are going to be upset. They are going to be crying. They are going to be mad or they are going to be frustrated or angry or whatever it is. Let them vent a little bit.
I am not very good at that with my own son. I am very quick to rush to judgment of so and so, “I was upset because the umpire did this,” to, “You can’t criticize the umpire because the umpire is going to make bad calls.”
I quickly go on to a bit of coach speak there. I need to catch myself. I’m not very good at it. I just need to catch myself and let Alan vent about the umpire for a minute.
Let him get that out of his system. Then I can come back and say, “Well you realize though that you are going to have bad umpires and they are going to make mistakes just like you do.” You need to give it some time and let them get that out whether it’s a mistake they made or it’s a mistake a coach made or whatever it is.
Let them vent that out a little bit. Then go back and process it with them a little bit later once they have gotten it that, “Yeah I know you felt that way but let’s intellectually process through this.” Separate the emotion from the intellectual bit, but let the emotion happen first.
It is great to ask permission if they want your feedback because a lot of times kids don’t want to hear it. They need to express themselves.
They don’t want to hear how Dad did that when he was 15 or how he overcame that challenge and won the World Series 30 years ago.
They don’t want to hear it. Eventually they might after they have vented and built up trust that they will want to hear your feedback and suggestions.
Time heals a lot of wounds there.
If you missed the first Part of this series click here.
To go to the next part of this series, click here.
Dan Clemens is a 10-year youth coach spanning four sports, a baseball umpire and basketball referee. He also was a Division I scholarship athlete.
Coach Dan is the author of an amazing book A Perfect Season: A Coach’s Journey to Learning. Click here to buy Dan’s book!